I think that on occasion I have totally pissed a few women off because they couldn’t really get a rise out of me over certain issues.  (I’m really saying that in much too nice of a way)  I think that I pissed a few women off because I would not let them get under my skin.  And not just that they couldn’t get under my skin but I try not to let anyone get there.  I don’t like to be angry.  And I don’t like to argue.  I like to debate points, but not at the expense of raising my blood pressure.  And a lot of people can’t stand that.  Men and women.  It’s like the old saying goes.  Disagree without being disagreeable.  Now I would be lying if I said that I have not parted ways with someone after a disagreement with a new-found sense of loathing for them, their intellect and their sense of righteousness or lack there of…..but that is really my problem.  Not theirs.  And luckily for me I can’t really hold grudges.  So even when someone tells me that they don’t vote, or that they don’t believe in global warming, or when guys refer to themselves as pimps or when people blame their funky attitudes on that’s just how I am…..I get over it.  I may not forge a life long friendship with them, but I don’t act as if I have some sort of problem speaking to them or being in their company…on a limited basis of course.  And this sort of attitude has served me well in many cases.  My personal philosophy is, that if what I have to say to someone is not reaching them or is not met with some measure of appreciation, then either find another way to say it or leave it alone.  But definitely don’t harp on something that is a part of who someone else is.  At least I rally try no too.  Because then the root of the disconnect is being exacerbated by YOU.  And not the person who you believe to be the unenlightened idiot.

1.  I never let my hard feelings about something go for more than a few hours.  I can’t stand this type of stuff because it puts someone in a position to feel like they have to walk on egg shells not to set someone off about missing the trash pick-up day from last week.  ( Gee, I’m sorry that I have shown myself to be totally unreliable for all things important and vital to our lives because I missed the trash pick-up day.  My gosh.  How will we ever make til the next 4 days for them to come again?)

2.  Even though you are the only Black Man in the Tea Party rally I am not going to hate you and no longer say hello to you at church.  Now I might call you a Damn fool when I call me dad and recite some of the dim-witted political jargon that you repeated…. but hey, it was all just for laughs my friend.  So when I see you at church next week I will just engage you in conversation about your views and let you explain to me and other folks why you think it’s appropriate for Glenn Beck to hold a rally on the Mall on the anniversary of MLK’s I Have a Dream speech.  After that…………..I think you will have more than a few people praying for your sanity.

3.  Just because your older sister says some really offensive things about my profession or my hobbies or my choices in home decor, I promise I won’t be mad at you for that sweets.  Now I might go on a 20 minute rant that I have pre-prepared about your sister called…The Nerve of You Herbs….  But after that, it is all good.  Just make sure you continue to give me the heads up when she is going to be around.  Thanks in Advance!

4.  Even though I told you not to repeat what “Luke” told me about “Laura” when we went out on our double date, you felt the need to tell her anyway.  And not only have you betrayed the privacy that we share as a couple but I look like a sucka in front of “Luke”.  Now even though this is one of those offenses that makes me want to kick you in the stomach like a little kid on the kindergarten playground, I promise to only be upset for a little while.  As long as you tell me you understand why I am upset then I can let it go.  And even if you tell me I am over-reacting and you can’t understand… I can still let it go.  Just don’t expect me to tell you anything else that I know about our favorite soap opera couple!  So Na-Nanny-Boo-Boo to you!

The point is people, be happy…..or at least don’t be so damn mad.  Be aware of your behavior when you are holding grudges.  Slamming doors, giving your lady the silent treatment or refusing to kiss your boyfriend is not cool.  I believe that emotions are transferred from person to person, when they are strongly emitted, to the people who are closest to you.  If you are in a foul and funky mood then just be aware that you are putting that on the person who is closest to you.  Maybe not right away all the time, but gradually.  You are bringing someone else down. Wear the sort of happiness that you want to see in the people around you as if you are wearing a badge of honor.  I know you can’t all be as super jovial as me without having some ups and downs.  But just make sure that you are trying to have more Ups than Downs and I guarantee that you and the person you are with will be that much happier.