I could have easily constructed a list of five turn-ons that consisted of all sorts of common and overused cliché’s that women have been bombarded with like Pretty Feet, Good Cook, Sexual Nature, blah , blah,blah…. But that sort of stuff not only seems devoid of much thought but most of it goes without saying. Do I really need to say that a nice body is a turn on? I don’t think so. So I tried to compile a list that had some helpful cues that a lot of guys gave me feedback on.
Guys enjoy women who can be prissy when the time calls for it but also have a little bit of tomboy in her when she’s off the clock. It is really fun to be able to get competitive with your lady and talk a little trash every now and again. If a woman can be ladylike but still be care free enough to play fight, wrestle, and talk a little smack while we play spades……Jackpot!!!! And if you are an athletic girl who doesn’t mind playing a sport with a guy like say, flag football, bowling or basketball…..Powerball Jackpot!! Usually the competitive and playful aspect of a guy’s personality can only be fed by hanging around with other guys. But to have a woman who totally fits into that mold as well, is like being the only guy to catch something on a 5 hour fishing trip. You feel like what you have is the envy of all those around you and you just pity the guys who are going without.
A Woman Who Can Handle a Stick— I once read in a woman’s magazine that it speaks to a woman’s level of competency if she can drive. And I don’t mean drive as in, you have a license. My 91-year-old grandmother has a license. I mean a woman who can really whip her automobile around confidently. Not recklessly but comfortably enough to where getting into a car to drive someplace is not some sort of chore for her. And over the years of dating women, I have to admit that I have seen a real correlation between women who cannot drive and the annoying, whiny, “come please me” sort of women that I never mesh well with. After about a month of dating a woman like that, guys really start to feel like valets/chauffeurs. I guess I have become accustomed to driving when I am out with a woman but it becomes annoying as hell when a woman puts limitations on what she can or is willing to do because she doesn’t like to drive. No man feels anymore manly by having a woman ask him to drive her someplace because she doesn’t like to drive at night, gets nervous on the beltway or has trouble following directions to places she has never been. Yo Sweets! I’m your boyfriend, not your daddy. It is so refreshing to have a woman who doesn’t mind picking me up every once in a while or at least just being cool with meeting me somewhere. Even after a day of driving all over the place the simple offer to take the wheel for the ride home is really appreciated.
Dressed to Impress….Not to Excite. Women are the masters at dressing sexy and then wanting to be seen as something more than sexual objects. It baffles most guys because we generally work off of very simple instinctive cues. Don’t show you off you cleavage and wear a super tight and short skirt and then engage a man in a conversation about Global Warming. It’s called dressing sexy….not smarty! Dressing in a way to get a man’s sexual attention is pretty easy. But dressing in a way that makes a man truly desire you in a way beyond the physical is a lost art. Guys really enjoy seeing a woman look beautiful and respectable. (Not Necessarily Glamorous) Women who can draw compliments on being classy or uncommon are things that really turn men on. And try to think of it as a guy being turned on from the stomach up as oppose to the waist down. At a certain point men are no longer speechless by seeing a woman with a fat ass or buxom breasts. That sort of stuff makes a man’s pecker jump for sure. But seeing a woman who has managed to capture her sexuality and control it leaves a longer lasting impression. Only sharing enough of it to keep a man curious allows a guy to evaluate her in other and more in-depth ways. It’s like meeting a woman who embodies the marriage between being a woman who I want to take home at this moment……..as well as the girl to take by my mom’s house to show her off! Powerful synergy. Powerful indeed. Instead of just feeling a pounding sensation in his crotch he will also feel the butterflies in his stomach. Much more uniqueness in that second feeling.
A Woman Who Wears Many Hats—It is very comforting to be with a woman who can wear a hat for many different occasions. What I mean by that is, she can get along with anyone. And if she doesn’t think that she mixes well with a specific crowd she can certainly adapt long enough to get through the moment without being so caught up in her own preferences to make a little sacrifice to be with people she may not know that well. The older people get the more attached they become to the genuine relationships that they have. I have maintained friendships with people who I don’t have a whole lot in common with at this point in my life but they are good people. And I value them in some way that you may not be able to see right away on the surface. And to be with a woman who will tolerate an elementary school buddy’s corny jokes or not act completely offended by an older cousin who uses a lot of profanity, speaks a lot about how mature a woman is. How easy-going she is and how comfortable things will be for us both no matter where we go together. And not that I would want her to subject herself to things that make her feel uncomfortable or a regular basis, but I just want to feel relaxed when I leave her in the room with my boisterous uncle that she will not get all persnickety about being amongst people who are different from you. I know my boy from junior high school is not a Rhode scholar and didn’t go to college but he is a good friend to me. So I would appreciate being with a woman who doesn’t act like it is beneath her to be in his company when he starts to talk about things that she is not into.
Shut yo ass up…..Sweetie!—No one is above making mistakes, doing stupid things or most of all being corrected. And guys know that. We all need someone to pull our coattails and bring us back down to Earth when we get carried away. The thing that men value is a woman who can do that in a playful, non-threatening, “I’m still a man” sort of way. I talk waaayyyy too much sometimes and I can easily get carried away on one of those days when I think that I am extra smart and that someone wants to hear me talk. The truth is that sometimes people are probably just indulging me because they don’t want to tell me to BEAT IT!( can you believe it!) But because I am not the sensitive type……..well….not the overly sensitive type, I can receive a good old-fashioned,” Jackson will you hush up please? Youre boring people!”, from a woman and be cool with that. As long as it is done in a jokingly serious, non-threatening or embarrassing sort of way. What I don’t need is for you to tell me to “Shut your dumb ass up”! Men can receive the point from a lady without having it given to him like instructions to a child. That is what infuriates men and puts them off so much. Just the other day my cousin jokingly prodded me to stop talking her co-workers to death. I blushed a little, but did realize that I was rambling so it was all good. And I politely toned it down and gracefully slid out of the driver’s seat of the conversation. No harm, no foul……..… I just made sure to track dirt in her car on the way home!